-Ashley Hawkins-
I was going to start this post off by saying "Merry Christmas errrbody!" But then i realized it is 12:15 AM and Xmas ended 15 minutes ago. O how time flies...
It is a crazy thing. I feel like i was just talking to the guys about how it is going to be so much fun when they come out. How i could not wait. That was like four months ago. And now they will be here (with the exception of Landon who comes a little later) in about 2 and a half hours. I feel like the last 6 months of my life have kind of escaped me.
I think part of the problem is that i feel devoid of purpose. It is like my main goal in life right now is to go to school...and i think you all know how i feel about school. And i also have no one really close to me to share my days with. So i tend to just float by waiting for the future to come about. And i don't like that. Cause then when good things happen that i have been looking forward to (like this Grand Canyon adventure), they come and go, and i get bummed out again, waiting for the next thing to happen. And i don't know what God wants me to do...
And that is another thing. As i was waiting to come back to Arizona, i began to just let time pass with out a lot of consideration to what i was doing. And i let my relationship with God slip, and replaced Him with other things. And so it is like a vicious circle...i need guidance, but in the absence of guidance i go astray. Perhaps there in lies the point. God is teaching me patience and endurance...
So i am not sure where i am going from here. I do have plans for the next six months or so, and possible ideas for afterwards, but i am really not one-hundred percent positive. I really just want a clear vision from God. Perhaps having all the guys here will help. I know it is going to be so good...i just wish i wasn't so tired right now. Haha.
Well. I don't really feel like posting this...it isn't all that great. But o well, i am over-due! Sorry about my absence guys.
4 comments:
I am here for you brother...you are currently across the house from me sleeping but some of us can't sleep for some reason and I decided to stop by and read your new post...
I must say that I find myself in a similar position to you...perhaps we shall talk more about this later...but in short, I'm hoping that this Grand adventure of ours will help provide some clarity and direction...
I'm so stoked that we get to journey through this together...we'll get there somehow...
i can't see the picture!
story of my life, kevin.
i am tired, oh so tired.
you guys are probably coming back from the canyon now. or you better be........
a rush of blood to the head.
hey, what happened...didn't you have a new post up not too long ago? where'd it go?
Post a Comment