I Clicked Create

I am going to be writing a lot of posts. I have been trying to keep track of who i have told what, and who i have not told what, and what i have not told to whom, and whom i did not tell of what, and i loose track of it all. So, short of keeping a log of what topics i cover in what conversations, i think that creating more blogs will help me to keep the bases covered.

I have been doing a lot of reading and watching of movies of late and i must say i thoroughly enjoy it. I just finished reading "90 Minutes in Heaven" and i have moved on to Praise Habit by David Crowder. I have read a grand total of about 12 pages, and from that little bit i have decided that i absolutely love the book. David Crowder's writing is humorous and fun, but also poetic and deeply moving...

Where were the God moments? Where was Living Praise? Did praise Happen? Could praise happen? What if it did? Were opportunities missed? Was praise just beneath the service? Could it be a flood? Maybe it's just damned? Maybe if the damn burst we would drown in it. Do we dare pick up a sledgehammer and start swinging? It could be difficult. It could wear at you. This could be hard labor. I don't know if i have the back for it. And i think i like my water in small doses. I like the sound of the drip. But there is cracking in my lips and they bleed when i smile. My hands are dry to the touch. So dry i can't feel you anymore. Pick it up? It is needed? It is what is necessary? I want to drown. I want a different air than what i've been breathing. I will swing. I will swing with all my might. I will swing until there is the sound of breaking. I will swing. Over and Over and Over and Over and Over and Over ad Over and Over and Over and Over...

-David Crowder-

I love how he compares the thirst for water, and the cracking of dried lips when smiling, to our need to give God praise. I know that feeling. The feeling of your skin cracking as you try to express enjoyment. The lines showing where there is not enough moisture. Lines that split when strained. It is annoying, perhaps not unbearable, but very unpleasant. And that is what life becomes when we go with out acknowledging God's glory.

Reading what i write, and paying attention to my thoughts, i have come to realize that i romanticize a lot. Although i feel it is usually in relation to God and what he is doing in my life and the lives of people around me. Perhaps i want my life to be like the stories in the movies and the books. I think that life with God is like that though. And so with this post i will continue to romanticize with God. I suppose he does not have a Create button.

Familiarities Lost

Familiarities lost
And common happenings gone

Nothing cost
Only in the way a heart would long

Immediacy spent
As dreams pull us apart

Emotionally bent
Yet God will mend the heart

Constant Renewal

I have been thinking a lot about a lot recently...and i think i came up with a thesis for my Doctorate...haha.

I was talking to my mom about leaving Hawaii recently and i was trying to convey my feelings on the matter...and this kind of relates to my last post...about excitement for new things and how it cancels out the hurt of loosing the old. And it got me to thinking about change, and how humans deal with change.

It seems we as humans like new things, yet at the same time we like consistency. We like to know we have security in a house, yet we like new houses, and new things in our houses. But even apart from superficial things i have noticed this. We (or most people at least) like making new friends, but just as long as we can hold on to those friendships. People don't go around making new friends everyday and dumping the old ones, we appreciate longevity in our relationships. So it is hard for us to break old ties.

Yet this idea of consistency with change also carries over in to the natural world. Nature is always changing, the sunset is always different, yet there are always the same components at play. Such as the sun and the sky and the horizon. A forest might burn down and re-grow, having a new geographical lay out, but it is mostly the same none the less...you have trees, and animals, and bugs, and birds, and dirt...life goes on. Also the same can be said about humans. We are all made up of the same components, each with a nose, eyes, mouth, etc. (you don't have the occasional person popping out wings or a 6th sensing article), but not one in 6 billion looks exactly the same.

I then carried this on even further. I connected it to some of the thoughts i had on time. Time is always moving forward, so the future is always ahead of us, the present is always escaping us, and the past is always behind us. It almost seems as if there really isn't a "now" to speak of, because as soon as you speak it...it is gone. Time is always there, and yet it is always changing.

And what does this all mean? The fact that we are always experiencing newness and yet always holding on to the same things? And it seems that this is like God. God is the same yesterday, today and forever, we have all heard that a million times. God is a constant in our lives. We know we can turn to Him in a time of need and he will be there, always loving, and never failing in that love. Yet, we seem to always be learning more and more about God's character. The God i seemed to know 5 years ago is almost not the same God i know today, but He is. And i think this is where it comes from, this theory of constant renewal, it comes from God. It is like a part of God's character. God remains the same, but he is so vast that we can only get little glimpses of him at a time. Little shiny sparks of love and life, light particles from a beautiful God that will forever amaze us. Yet he has been there all along, waiting for us to witness Him, and it is just that we are tiny little humans, who don't understand the world, and though we try our hardest, it seems we will always be nothing but children, playing in the creation that surrounds us.